It has been awhile since I have blogged. I am not sure why. I guess it may be my inability to unleash, lately. But, I am here now. My end of the week-weekend seems to have brought on a true epiphany. I guess the $125 spent with sitting on a couch is well spent. With the decision to invest full time, in the fall, researching and applying to grad school, it seems that I know have a clear idea on where my life could be going. It is also incredibly exciting that I will know no one in less than a year. Or know a neighborhood. Or know where to find anything. Though, I know one thing for sure at this point, I know myself. And, even more importantly, I trust myself. Boston has been great moment in my life but for the last few months, which we "could" call the summer, I have been incredibly lonely, even though I have been surrounded with people and friends. How does that make sense? It isn't that I am specifically looking for a boyfriend or even at this point, a date. It is the idea though that I really think I am just tired of my entire life here. I am bored in doing the same old thing. I am bored with the same old conversation. The same people. The same moments. (Even if they are spent with friends). The same attitude. The same lack of a whole lot of life.
It really came to head this weekend when I went to see "Garden State" with Greg and Matt and what turns out to be Greg's new roommate. After some dive but fun Mexican restaurant, two frozen mugs of margaritas, and a cute and amusing movie, it was dampened by the idea that for some reason, my "strong" opinion on life, and specifically at this moment a movie, was too much to handle for some. It could possibly be me. Or it could possibly be others. But, I strongly feel that life (which this movie was totally about) should be honest and real. You should say what you believe even if people will look at you oddly. Surprisingly, even after watching a movie about understanding how real life actually is, my opinion on just that came as a surprise to the "few" who believed otherwise. Then again, who would know, since their opinion was never said.
So, what else is up. Well, I am slightly tan again after a beach moment in Nantasket. Never been before. And, Never Again. It was like the ghetto meets the beach. It would have been easier if some people brought their trailers to the beach. Why cart all that food when your house rolls? But, I dreamily stared at a boy who had a white pookah necklace and hair like Ashton's. It was like a little bit of California. Or maybe it was all a dream in the buzz from the smuggled and hidden Smirnoff Ice drinks we were drinking. Anyways, the water was cold enough to freeze major parts of your body off. Not to mention you had to be cautious not to be hit with a football or some other object used for sport.
Then again, it was better than last weekend spent bar-hopping or more like drama-hopping with the boys and girls in Fanuiel Hall. How stupid can you possibly be to smoke inside of a bar when you aren't supposed to be smoking in it? A ban, almost a year old. But, the larger than life Budlights were yummy. Wow, what a messy week. Having your pie and eating it too doesn't work. Especialy if you are a fat girl and want 6 pieces. Also, go see Hero. It is absolutely beautiful. The scenes are just amazing.