It all begins with champagne, three Screwdrivers and well, thats about it because I was already drunk and the god awful week (again) was slowly evaporating away. Though it could be said so were my braincells. Oh well. So, after enough drinking to make me not need another drink for the rest of the night, the boys (Matt, Mike, Greg) and I all packed into Greg's little red sportscar to zip over to Cambridge (don't forget stealing flowers to place into parking spot since it is now winter in Boston and people kill for the spaces) for a nightclub that now makes us all feel old (disgustingly) and that overall hasn't been exciting as it was when I went when I was 19.
Strip off jacket in 30 degree weather. Run to the line. Hand over license. All sounds normal, right? Well, it does until the bouncer proceeded to interrogate me because he "smelled" alcohol on my breath. And I mean he wasn't going to let me into the fucking 19yo club. Like, who does that? Usually they check for drugs or if you aren't 21 but stopping me because I had a "drink" just seems ridiculous. To top it all off, I was even more offended when he asked what I was drinking and then proceeded to answer for me by saying, "Whiskey!?" I was like. Hells no, I don't drink whisky. Vodka, and all of my friends behind me have beeen too and I am not anywhere near drunk nor are they. (If I was to fall, so shall the rest). Haha. Eventually I was let in. I performed my usual monkey trick hanging from the ledge on the way to the bathroom. We danced and hung around. Nothing really that exciting until Mike and I noticed a huge wad of bills on the dance floor and being the good little angels that we are, we thought we should pick it up and bring it to the front desk. (Which means split it evenly and put it into your wallet). Well, it turns out that as Mike is bending down to pick up the cash, trying not to grab attention as we ARE in the middle of the dance floor, some fat little black girl comes over, grabs us both with her she-male arms and proceeds to claw her Lee Press On Nails into our necks as she flips out about how someone "stole the cash" from her and how we got another thing coming if we think we are taking it. As I am like, calm down which later turned into calm down you bitch, she turns into some raging fucking ghetto-ass girl as Mike and I are horrified and now screaming at her, calm down and leave us alone. Take "your" money and "your fucking nails out of our neck!"
Overall I left the night with a boys phone number (23yo from Brazil, lick) and stories. So maybe, my miserably down week which I have categorized as a TOTAL LOSS, could possibly pay off. Oh shit... my horoscope said I would find love on Thursday! OMG !
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