left brain: How I Accidently Hired a Hooker

As promised, I am writing about my little adventures through two Brasilian bathhouses, both of which were in Rio and one of which was the hottest bathhouse I have ever been to. I will leave that one for the latter. As I was writing this though, my boss told me that she has been reading my blog, and since that scares the hell out of me, I am going to give you a little warning here before you actually get into the meat of the article, so to speak. So you will actually need to follow the jump to get to the stories but I think they are worth it. As it's my first attempt at writing gay porn, haha.

The second bathhouse we I went to was in the neighborhood of Copacabana and I think the name of it was something like 202 Sauna, or something. It was basically right up against one of the scariest favella's in town as there were wooden steps a few doors down that if you walked up would take you into the shanty housing. ~~We,~~ Sorry, I myself had to climb up about 2 flights of stairs to get to the door of the place and upon entrance was greeted by someone working the register and two "very clearly working" guys, much beefier and older than my taste. They, however, thought I was perfect and followed me to the lockers, watched me strip, and then watched me make some attempt in Portuguese to get flip flops from the counter as they tried to tempt me into buying them as well. I denied their attempts, at all costs, and declothed into my towel and flip flops before running away and heading straight for the stairs. The second floor I thought was going to be better since the first floor seemed to be a little overrun with boys/guys/men watching return results of the Sambadrome festivities the night before, like an American election yet more exciting, lol. Anyways, so I walk upstairs and cruise the sauna, steam room, additional room area, and basically decide that this place sucks and is seriously a little too grimy. I decide to sit in the steam room until one of the jacked muscle studs comes in wanting to further convince me that I should hire him. He honestly just wasn't my type. So I sit there thinking to myself...shit...this has failed, lol.

Disgruntled, I walk to lean against the balcony of the bathhouse which is when I notice the only, exciting, younger, guy in the place and he is quickly approaching the stairs up. I think to myself smiling, "Great." But then I notice my best friend nearly running after him like a lion at dinner while the other hyena's sitting around the Samba results cackle and drool. We will from here on call the exciting boy Favella stud since he turns out to have been from the one up the mountain behind the bathhouse. So, back to he action. I turn around and lean against the wall, cruising him as he comes up the stairs, my friend in hot pursuit, and walks right by me. It turns out he was as hot up close as he was from afar. A tattoo covered his shoulder, he was lean and ripped, and very dark Brasilian looking. My friend walks past me and says on the way by, "He is Mine." Even though I could have created competition for him I decided that he needed his "bathhouse moment" since I have already had mine in the one previous and being greedy is never cool. They disappear in the sauna and then later a room where supposedly it was discovered that this boy had nearly a third leg, or one could say 10 inches of fun. It was also discovered he had a child and he unofficially was a rent boy. As I heard, he heads down the mountain every so often to fuck around with guys and get some cash because either his daughter/sister/mother up in the favella needs help.

I figure at this point that there is little hope for any action for me, having given up/lost the hottie favella boy. So I head back downstairs where I figure I can at least join in on the excitement of the samba drome results. I sit down on the outskirts of the group and decide that I have nothing to do but wait for my friend which is when I turn my head to the left and see a buzzed haired, lean, twenty-something year old groping his hardon through his barely visible towel. I smile. He continues catching my eye. I smile, lick. I sit there for a little while more and decide that I am bored even with the kid groping himself. So I get up and head back to the room I had rented and figure I should just get ready to go. As I head back to the room I notice the kid following me and I think to myself, "what the hell?" He was hot in the half hour sorta way, a little young but incredibly hung (like all Brasilians it seems). He approaches me and says something in Portuguese and I basically attempt to reply in Portuguese. Quickly he learns that I am American, or at least speak English since I now rarely say I am an American, and we proceed to have some struggle with words. I do, however, get the idea that he is talking to me because he is trying to get me to pay him. US $40 to suck him off, $80 to get fucked, and $100 for him to actually cum. I was like, no, even though I was at this point OMG horned up. He gropes himself hard again as he is talking to me and eventually pulls it out from underneath the towel which is when I basically started drooling, sadly. He was a thick nine inches cut with a totally trimmed package and a beautiful glow to his skin. I continue to have some banter with him about how I am not paying him and he eventually says, or what I believe him to say, "Okay, no money." So I go ahead and bring him into my room, we make out with him for like a minute groping our already hard dicks, lie on the scary bed together, and go to town sucking each other off. He is basically ready to blow 10minutes into the oral festivies so I basically quicken up the pace for myself and do it first, thinking that he is nearly ready. So, I shoot all over his chest and he basically gets up and is like, hot, and then we start to get dressed which is when I decide that he doesn't want to finish since he was the one getting his towel on. At this point, I start to decide that this wasn't free. And as we proceed to leave the room, he basically puts out his hand and I in return said, your kidding. Of course he has no understanding of what I am saying. So he follows me down to my locker, where you lock your wallet right next to the exit, and even though I don't have enough cash with me (as I proceed to tell him in a mix of English and Portuguese) he still sits there. So I am thinking shit, now I am going to have to ask my friend to give me cash to pay this hooker when I don't think we ever agreed on anything or even a price. US $40 later, I basically run to the Copacabana Palace to cleanse my mouth in the bathroom before downing two Pina Colada's to forget about the facts of 15minutes previous.

The first bathhouse was hotter and a lot more fun for me. It was again a lot smaller than any other sauna that I have been too. It was in a house located a few blocks from Ipanema beach and like all of the other bathhouses/saunas in town are extremely popular from 3pm until 8pm, and close at like midnight which is basically when bars/clubs open. So after chilling on the beach for the day, I head to the bathhouse at like 3:30 this time with 3 friends. I quickly shower the sand out of the private places, abandon my friends inside since unlike the second bathhouse, I noticed the hot boys first. And when I say hot, I mean HOT. This was the hottest one of these places that I have ever been to on many continents and in many countries. Freshly clean I head upstairs to the little lounge area which leads to a dark hallway lined with private rooms and cruising halls and rooms. I stroll around for awhile cruising before coming upon the bathhouse boy of my dreams. My height, mid 20's, dark "I just got out of bed or sex" hair, dark soulful eyes, slightly scruffy, tattoo on his chest of the sun (appropriate enough for Rio), totally lean but toned, six pack, and again...horse hung. The hottest thing though or what caught my attention first was that underneath the typical towel they give out, dreamy bathhouse boy was wearing his squarecut bright blue bathing suit. He wasn't as trashy as my second bathhouse encounter, the boy groping himself, though being in Brasil there were plenty people doing so. Given my new found confidence in life, I approached him without hesitation. He responded very well and was within 5 minutes down my throat. His tongue, not his cock...yet. He also spoke English which I learned more towards the end of our "encounter" not right upfront. Weird yes but I kinda just figured he didn't speak English so after our small talk about how he was hot, kissing felt appropriate. Needless to say, we ended up in one of the rooms and were excitedly going at it. Oddly enough, or not, I still remember the smell of his sweat mixed with the beach and the cheap cachaca. Both of our dicks were hard as rock and totally rubbing against the other so the towels had a hard time staying around our waist. But then there was an extra step, the blue bathing suit, which was so much hotter than just removing the towel. I was already naked and thrilled so after more time making out, groping, fondling, etc etc, I got down and took his seriously 9+ inch uncut meat out of the squarecut. I wrapped both of my hands around him (this is where I think I came up with my new rule of: if my hand fits around your dick and there is no dick to be seen, well...it isn't going to happen again) and after toying around with it, his balls, and the hot smell of him in his inner thighs, sucked him until he couldn't take not sucking me any longer. Or so I thought since he basically picked me up off the slightly gross floor and threw me on the bed. He layed on top of me and made out with me as we sat indian style facing each other. This lasted for god knows how long before he just layed forward downing my dick with me sitting back against the wall. Once we got each other to the point of orgasm, he totally was rough and tumble and throwing me around (totally hot) and was basically putting me into a position to get fucked. Which is totally cool, and hot, but we were in a bathhouse without condoms or lube readily available. And for 9+, I am going to need lube. We recognize that we need a condom though he tried otherwise, and I sent him out to get one. Serious bummer and work but he came back still hard (I wish I could have seen the faces of the others in the place) and basically jumped right back in where he left off. Me on my back, lol. The problem was that he came back without lube and I sorta think he knew it too since he made a huge attempt to get me totally ready, fingers, serious making out, serious toying with my dick and ass, and roughing me up (which other than my response to him, I have no idea how he knew it was hotter). Needless to say, when he shoved in and started pounding, I basically gasped not at pain but at the amusement that I was taking his seriously hung Brasilian meat without lube, lol. He fucked like an animal, in many positions, and payed attention to the bottom like only one other I have known. It went on for like 20 or more minutes, just the fucking and I held out until I knew he was close. Once I shot on my chest, spraying the wall behind me, and his chest since he was super close to me making out, he pulled out and did the same. It was amazingly hot. It was also at this point though that he said, in English, where are you from and what do you, and...do I get your email.

haha... so, well.. yah, thats it.

Comments

I don't know how I even found this place but amazing story, that was hot as hell :p

Posted by: Leo | June 14, 2007 at 03:37 PM

no lube, i'm proud of you. that say some things about you... but whatever, it's still hot! =)

Posted by: Reese | March 22, 2006 at 05:08 PM

How tawdry, and with no lube, you little slut! I'm going to Amsterdam next week, I can only pray I experience half as much fun as you did at this sexsational bathhouse. Sigh...

Posted by: Perrin | March 14, 2006 at 03:49 PM